Mother’s Day

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Its Mother’s Day on 13th May 2007.

Usually I would be buying something for my mother but this year, I think It would be only a chocolate.

I have mentioned many times..My mum is someone whom I would give my life for.

She is not educated.

She is not the most modern mum.

She does not always give me choices.

She is not always in a good mood.

She tend to take her anger on me.

She tend to think that girls should behave in this certain way.

She has little trust in people.

She is loud.

She just irritates me like hell at times.

But still she is the one who gave me the life I have now.

She is the one who stayed up night after night looking after me when I had asthama attack.

She is the one who stuggled to provide me with a education.

She is the one who taught me the importance of integrity in this money-based world.

She is the one who would lay down her life for me like I would for her.

She is the one who went back and fro to find a primary school for me when the principal rejected our application.

She is the one who always tell me not to worry, she would take care of everything.

She is the one who work more then 12 hours to put a roof over our head and food on our plate.

She is the BEST gift i can have in my life.

THE BEST MOTHER!!!

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY!!!

I LOVE YOU AMMA!!!

additional::

I feel like talking about my mother today…Not in some continous, flowing essay but in diconnected comments..thoughts… kind of way.

Everyone..well almost everyone get surprised with the fact that I feel so much loyalty and love towards to india, even though i have only spent 3 years in India.. And that 3 years were the first 3 years of my life. So actually i didnt remember anything about my country. The only country i know was Singapore where i spent 19 years of my life. The strong sense of loyalty that i have towards india is because of my mother only. She used to tell me stories abt india..and still do…all abt patriotic freedom fighters..how much blood they shed to free india..all abt the politicians..She kindered the fire in my heart for my country. she always told me to stand up for my country and at the same time not critise the country i grew in. She always told me that the only place where u can go back regardless of what state u are in and get accepted is your homeland.Along with the loyalty, she also taught me the beauty of the Tamil language. She is the one who always read to me in Tamil..always sayin how beautiful our language is. how we should never give it up as it is our culture..roots…If I seem to know so much about Tamil language and India, its all because of my mother. For all these knowledge, she only had 5 years of formal education in india.

People who see her, wont see the strength in her heart. They always see the soft woman who is super senstitive. They tend to miss the the strength she portrayed throughout her life..

She is one remarkable woman i have seen in my life. With no education, expereince she came to singapore where she learned to live for her family by herself.

Now she is so old. The age is starting show in the face and phisical strength. Nowadays i feel as if i am the mother and she is the daughter. From the age of 16, I have been the mother. Always feeling scared for her safety and health.

I donnoe I want to say alot of things about my mother. I love her so much like no one else in my life. I can give up anyone for her. I want to do so many things for her. she never had any pleasure in her life from the time she married and came to singapore. I hope to give her the peace that she always wanted. And let her to do anything she wants without worrying about money. But i am also scared that it would be too late by the time i can give her all these. I pray to the god to protect my mother and wat do they do. make her more sick…I have been feeling so scared that i wanted to tell someone….so here it is…a entry about my mother all confused up.

I know many times i have shouted at her..made her cry, sad and angry..but after every incident i feel so sad. she doesnt know that. the only face she is sees is a serious face. someone gotta be strong at this time. I see a woman who have weathered badly trying to survive in this cruel world.. I see a woman who is at the end of her wits. I see the hopelessness in our situation. I am scared.so scared.

[I know GOD… i cursed at you, scolded you..many times for the situation we are in…but now i am not asking for anything else…JUST LET MY MOTHER BE HAPPY HEALTHY.PLEASE]

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